For many couples, their wedding day is one of the most memorable days of their lives. So much time, planning, and money go into having the perfect day that will create memories you’ll cherish for the rest of your life. Along with all the planning and the money comes a lot of pressure to follow certain traditions or wedding stereotypes that may or may not fit in with the wishes and tastes of brides and grooms of today!
Many wedding traditions are great for making the big day unique and memorable. Still, we think there are a few that we should be saying goodbye to in 2022 and one really cool new trend that we are excited to see making a surge in popularity this year!
A gift registry has always been a way for guests at a wedding to help the newly married couple set up their first home. Traditionally a couple would register for household items such as pots and pans, towels, small appliances, and more. These days, most couples are either living on their own or living together before getting married. Since couples are waiting to get married until they’ve already established themselves in their career and home, they no longer need the most common items that are placed on a wedding registry. We think this tradition no longer fits the needs of married couples today. So instead of setting up a wedding registry, consider setting up a honeymoon fund or a charity fund that your guests can donate to in place of gifts.
Giving the Bride Away
This tradition dates back to a society in which a daughter was the property of her father until she was handed off to her husband and a dowry paid to the groom's family. The tradition of the father walking his daughter down the aisle was symbolic of the transfer of ownership from the father to the husband. In many cases, the woman didn’t even have a choice in who she would be married to. If that sounds incredibly outdated and nothing like the society we live in today, that’s because it is. These days women are strong, independent, and abundantly capable of making their own choices. These days, we see many brides walking alone or with one or both of their parents or grandparents as a sign of support for the couple, not some antiquated transfer of property, and we think that is a much better tradition!
We’ve all seen this one at a wedding and cringed at the messy cake smeared all over the beautiful clothes and hair of the couple. This one is especially cringe-worthy when it comes to the bride! Brides typically spend hours (and tons of money) on the perfect dress, hair, and makeup that makes them feel like the most beautiful version of themselves. After all that effort, no one wants their wedding day look to be ruined with sticky frosting and cake crumbs! Instead, we think giving each other a small (tidy) bite of cake or even eating your own bites of cake (we’re all adults; we can feed ourselves!) are a much better way to do the cake cutting tradition.
When most of us think of a bride, we picture the white dress, right? Well, did you know that the elaborate white dress only became mainstream after the second world war? It’s true, before then, it was much more common for women to simply wear their best dress on their wedding day, and it wasn’t a single-use dress either! Women were expected to remain chaste and pure before their wedding day, and the white dress became a symbol of their “purity.” These days, it’s much less common to expect a woman to remain chaste until they get married. Don’t get us wrong, if that’s a personal choice that you hold dear, you absolutely should stick to your own values, but we shouldn’t put that expectation or pressure on brides anymore. Plus, we really love the idea of choosing a dress and color that represents you and your own style and tastes!
Don’t get us wrong. There is something special about promising to love one another in sickness and health through the good and the bad. But the part we hate about traditional wedding vows is the “serve and obey” part. In traditional vows, the woman is expected to promise to serve and obey her husband. In some cases, she is expected to pledge to submit to him. This goes back to those same traditions of the husband being in control over the wife and her being subservient to him. These days, we prefer an equal partnership where the husband and wife work together to build a fulfilling and joyful life for them both. So instead of just sticking to the traditional vows, we suggest keeping the parts you like and filling in the rest with your own promises that you want to make to your partner!
Bridal Party Rules
In our opinion, the days of bridesmaids in matching dresses on the bride's side and groomsmen in matching tuxes on the groom’s are over! Instead, we like the idea of having a bridal party of mixed genders and outfits that make them feel comfortable! We all have friends and loved ones of all different genders and personalities, and we love them for who they are! So we really love the idea of members of the bridal party being able to stand up with their loved ones and be themselves!
This tradition is one that we can’t believe it’s still hanging around! The idea of putting your single friends on the spot and having them fight over a garter or a bouquet as a token of being the next lucky one to get married is so old-fashioned! Instead, if you’d like to hand off your bouquet to someone at your wedding, maybe give it to your grandmother or the longest married couple at the event!
We get the appeal of this tradition as a person who's getting married. We really do. But as a wedding guest, this tradition is no fun. It’s awkward sitting there watching three separate slow dances (father/daughter, mother/son, and first dance) and waiting for the songs to end before we can get out there and have fun! Some couples try to spice up this tradition with choreographed dances that are either really elaborate or funny to make this part of the wedding celebration more entertaining. Still, we feel like that just adds more stress and work on the couple's plates and their family. Trying to learn a new dance and feel confident performing it in front of all those people is one stressor that we think is unnecessary these days. Instead, invite your guests to join you on the dance floor from the beginning and just have fun!
Brides Family Foots the Bill
Traditionally the bride’s family was responsible for hosting and paying for all the wedding costs. In our opinion, this tradition is sexist and outdated. These days, most couples (especially those who have been living away from home for some time) choose to pay for their wedding. If the family of either person getting married would like to contribute to the wedding costs, that's great! But neither family should be expected to pay the entire bill.
This one may not be a tradition as much as it is a concerning trend we see a lot. The idea that your wedding day gives you the right to make over-the-top demands of your friends and family or that being the person getting married means you can mistreat people is so done! The point of getting married is to celebrate your love for another person and the start of a new life and family together. It’s a beautiful moment to celebrate with your family and friends. If you get so wrapped up in having the perfect day and being the one at the top of the heap who gets to do and say whatever you want, not only will your day not be a good time for those you’ve mistreated, but it could damage those relationships in the long run! So, while planning your big day, remember that people are more important than a party, and do your best to be gracious and kind to those who are there to support you on your big day!
Diamond Alternative Rings
There is one trend we’ve seen rising in 2022 that we absolutely LOVE! For what seems like forever, the diamond ring has reigned supreme in the engagement/wedding ring game. But in recent years, we’ve seen a resurgence of people moving away from the diamond ring and choosing other precious stones such as sapphire, emerald, ruby, and more! As much as we love the classic look of a diamond ring, it’s been really fun to see all the different types and colors of rings that have become more popular over the last few years!